In a world that always calls for prompt success, the place we really feel the strain to have all of it found out in our careers, relationships, motherhood, and private progress it’s simple to really feel like we’re falling behind. However what if we shifted our perspective? What if, as an alternative of seeing setbacks as failures, we embraced them as steps alongside our journey? That’s the place the Energy of But is available in.
What Is the Energy of But?
The idea of Not But comes from psychologist Carol Dweck’s groundbreaking work on the progress mindset. I not too long ago heard her talking concerning the Energy of But in her well-known TED Talk, she shared a narrative a few Chicago highschool that changed failing grades with the phrase “Not But.” As a substitute of feeling like they’d hit a lifeless finish, college students felt motivated to maintain going, understanding that success was nonetheless inside attain.
It acquired me into considering this straightforward but highly effective shift in mindset is also a game-changer for girls of their private {and professional} lives. Whether or not it’s pursuing a dream job, therapeutic from a previous relationship, or discovering steadiness as a mom, Not But reminds us that progress is a course of not a race.

How ‘Not But’ Is a Development Mindset for Ladies
1. It Reframes Failure/Pauses as Development
As girls, we are sometimes taught to worry failure to keep away from dangers, to be excellent, and to have all the things beneath management. However Not But permits us to see challenges as alternatives to develop relatively than causes to stop. As a substitute of claiming, “I failed at this,” we are saying, “I haven’t mastered it but.” or “I’m engaged on it”
Affirmation – Subsequent time you’re feeling like giving up, remind your self: I’m studying. I’m rising. I’m on my means.
2. It Helps in Practising Self-Compassion
Motherhood is stuffed with Not But moments. Possibly you’re nonetheless determining learn how to steadiness work and parenting, or learn how to carve out time for your self with out guilt. As a substitute of feeling such as you’re not doing sufficient, remind your self that you just’re a piece in progress identical to your youngsters.
Affirmation – I’m not failing, I’m studying and evolving.
3. It Helps Profession & Entrepreneurial Development
Dreaming of launching a enterprise? Attempting to land that management position? Feeling caught in your profession? Not But encourages us to maintain pushing ahead. The doorways we knock on at this time might not open instantly, however that doesn’t imply they by no means will.
Affirmation – Each setback is a setup for a comeback. I’ll carry on maintaining on!
Embracing ‘Not But’ in On a regular basis Life
You aren’t behind. You aren’t failing. You’re precisely the place it is advisable be studying, rising, and turning into. The subsequent time you’re feeling caught, remind your self: Not But just isn’t a No. It’s a Not Now. Your time is coming. Hold going. You haven’t figured it out but, however you’ll.
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What’s your ‘Not But’ second?
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